Just as I Thought

I admitted myself in to the hospital on Sunday to adjust my medication and ensure my continued health and strength. I knew I needed a boost of something to get over the rough spot.

The doctor increased one medication.

Last night Hubby came to see me after an appointment with his psychiatrist to tell me that he was moving back in to the home, filing for divorce and fighting for custody.

Thankfully because I had gone in to the hospital voluntarily I could be discharged to come home and take care of things. The staff was concerned about my stress level and the possibility of a conflict when I returned home and I assured them that if there was conflict I would not hesitate to seek outside assistance.

Of course Hubby said that he thinks me coming out of the hospital was a bad idea and that I only told the staff what I thought was necessary to get out of there. My health is too important to screw around with; I would not have left had I thought it not best. Also, I believe that the professionals who authorized the discharge have had enough experience to know when they are being snowed...even I'm not THAT GOOD!

When he left the house last night I immediately picked up the phone and called up to the hospital to let the staff know that I was okay and things were fine for the night.

This morning I called the hospital again to update them on my status and request a phone call from my psychologist to check in and let her know how it was going for me. I then made a call to social services to talk to the social worker our family has been working with. She was also concerned about my decision to leave the hospital and I reassured her the best I could that if I needed assistance I would not hesitate to ask. I have an excellent record of seeking out services for myself and my family when required. My mental health is not something I am ashamed of. I actively manage my illness with the help of medical professionals.

It is disheartening to think that my open and honest regard to my mental health would be used against me. It is no wonder some people choose to not seek services...and it was one of my concerns, that doing so would be somehow used against me. Society misunderstanding mental illness may come back to hurt me in a custody hearing. I am not willing to risk my health because of other people's misconceptions.

If I had cancer would this hospitalization even be an issue? Not likely. If I had diabetes and needed a medication adjustment would being admitted be held against me...doubt it.

I will continue to do what manage my illness however I need to in order to stay well. It's what I need to do for myself and my children.